


Choose

by rosetintmyworld



Series: Dead Water [16]
Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Insecurities, M/M, Mean fans, Polyamory
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-08
Updated: 2019-04-08
Packaged: 2020-01-06 14:14:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,252
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18390047
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rosetintmyworld/pseuds/rosetintmyworld
Summary: Winwin doesn't want to choose.





	Choose

Winwin dropped down onto the bed, his hands itching to nest. 

Of course it was a night where everyone was scattered around the dorms and he wanted nothing more than to be engulfed in the scents of his other members. 

He knew that sometimes he was a bit selective with his affection, but the need to be near others was cascading over him. 

He wished that he had gone to the dream dorm, that he could have nested with Chenle and Renjun. There was something about being able to speak his native tongue, being able to speak without having to translate first in his brain, and wondering if he were making sense, if he were mixing up phrases and words that comforted him. 

He needed the talk.

He had made the mistake of checking SNS, looking up his name in Naver. He liked to do it sometimes, liked to see what people were saying about him. He didn’t get many lines, and never really got to dance center, and he liked to feel appreciated. That was the nice thing about social media, he had a lot of fans, people who would go to bat for the omega, who would also get mad at SM when he was slighted, when he was underappreciated. 

Don’t get him wrong, he loved his team, and he loved his pack. He knew it wasn’t their faults, and with so many members, so many shining personalities and varied talents, it wasn’t hard to see why the quiet omega was left out sometimes. He came off to some as quiet and cold, and it didn’t help that he had been afraid to talk for a long time, afraid that his lack of fluency would offend others, and so he became known as the quiet one, and with that, people put him in the back and he was forgotten. 

Normally, looking through SNS made him feel less lonely, but not today. 

He found a twitter thread, some joke about the lines of NCT. He thought they were funny, last week he’d seen something like the big tiddy line of NCT, so he knew it wasn’t something too serious, but it was always interesting to see how the fans saw them. This video was titled the love triangle line. 

He clicked on it, watching as it introduced Taeil, Yuta, and finally him. He was in on the joke, he knew that his hyungs loved him, because they seemed unable not to show it. Winwin, even though he came off as apathetic, loved both of them too. He thought they were good hyungs, even if they chose to fight over him, for fanservice and for real sometimes. 

He scrolled through the comments, ready to giggle at the comments. 

He was sure someone was going to talk about how silly Taeil looked in that Belle costume, or would bring up Yuta’s one true love- a minion.

Instead, his heart sank as he scanned over the korean in front of him. 

He stopped, clicking on the comment and dropping it into a translator before rereading it again, unsure if he’d read it right. 

_ Winwin is such a slut. It isn’t fair that he’d leading Taeil ge and Yuta ge along that way. How can they even like him? _

Winwin knew about their crushes on him, they weren’t the most subtle, but Winwin didn’t do anything too mean. 

He liked the betas in his own special way. 

Winwin switched back to the comments, clicking on the thread from that comment.

_ Yeah, it’s honestly pathetic. What kind of omega would do that _

_ He’s probably sleeping with both of them _

_ Poor Yuta. It’s obvious that Winwin prefers Taeil. _

_ Winwin doesn’t prefer any of them, Winwin’s just soaking up the attention. Winwin even has Mark following after him _

_ The whole of NCT are full of hoes, what do you expect _

_ Winwin should just pick, he’s hurting both of them _

Winwin reread that last comment. 

He was hurting his hyungs?

Sure Winwin took advantage of the betas, but only in jest. Like the time that Taeil wanted them to have couple outfits at the SM halloween party. Winwin insisted on Taeil being Belle, thinking that the man’s designation would make him chicken out and he would leave him alone, but Taeil had been so nice about it, and did it anyway, just to make Winwin happy. 

They’d had a lot of fun. 

Yuta and him were the same, he’d forced Yuta to change his background on his phone to himself in order for Winwin to watch anime with him.

Winwin put his phone down, wishing he could talk to someone, wishing he could resolve the feeling in his chest. 

“Winwin-ah,” Taeil called as he opened the door. 

Winwin sat up, wiping at his eyes. 

When had he started to cry?

“What’s wrong?” Taeil asked, sitting on the edge of the bed. 

Yuta sat on the other side. 

“Nothing, leave me alone,” Winwin said and Yuta put his hand on his shoulder. 

“Winwin-”

“No both of you, leave me alone,” Winwin bit out and they both got off of the bed. 

“Sicheng-ah what’s-”

“What do you want from me?” Winwin shouted and they both froze. 

“We don’t- we don’t want anything from you,” Yuta said softly. 

“You do, you’re always confessing to me, fighting over me. Why don’t you take into account what that makes me look like, what that makes me.”

Winwin was trembling and his coffee heavy scent was turning sour in distress. 

“What it makes you- we never meant it to be disrespectful. We love you,” Taeil whispered and Winwin threw a pillow. 

“Stop it! Stop loving me!” Winwin begged and they both sat on the edge off the bed. 

“Did we make you feel threatened, or uncomfortable. Did I do something too forward?” Yuta asked and Winwin bit the inside of his cheek. 

He never wanted either Beta to feel like they’d done wrong, he just wanted them to realize what their feelings were doing to him. 

Those fans were right, Winwin was wrong, because he was leading them on, because he was letting them chase him, dropping little hints to keep them interested. It wasn’t like this would end well for any of them. 

Eventually Winwin would have to choose a mate, and he couldn’t choose between them. 

He was a slut. 

“No, it’s me. I’m being unfair to you two. You can’t- you can’t keep loving me, because I won’t choose between you,” Winwin whispered, picking at his bedspread. 

“Who said you have to chose?” Taeil asked and Yuta put his hand on Winwin’s knee. 

Winwin flinched away. 

“The fans, they think- they think I’m playing you. They think I’m a slut. I shouldn’t- I shouldn’t lead you on, so you have to stop,” Winwin begged and they both wrapped their arms around Winwin from either side.

“We didn’t realize you had so much pressure on you. We don’t want you to chose. You won’t have to choose if you don’t want to. You don’t have to pick either of us either. We know what it’s like together, no one else, not the fans, not even the rest of the band. We’ll never push you to choose between us, you don’t have to,” Taeil whispered. 

“As long as we love you, and you love us, you’ll never have to chose,” Yuta whispered and Winwin breathed in the intertwining scents around him, wondering if the way he loved them would ever be enough for them.


End file.
